were four patriarchs and two prophets on the Grand Stand that time--there hasn't been anything like it since Captain Kidd came; Abelwas there--the first time in twelve hundred years. A report gotaround that Adam was coming; well, of course, Abel was enough tobring a crowd, all by himself, but there is nobody that can drawlike Adam. It was a false report, but it got around, anyway, as Isay, and it will be a long day before I see the like of it again.

"Who?--all the patriarchs? Oh, no--hardly ever more than a couple.You will be here fifty thousand years--maybe more--before you get aglimpse of all the patriarchs and prophets. Since I have beenhere, Job has been to the front once, and once Ham and Jeremiahboth at the same time. But the finest thing that has happened inmy day was a year or so ago; that was Charles Peace's reception--him they called 'the Bannercross Murderer'--an Englishman. There

"Like as not. Of course they are pretty exclusive. They hardlyever show themselves to the common public. I believe they neverturn out except for an eleventh-hour convert. They wouldn't do itthen, only earthly tradition makes a grand show pretty necessary onthat kind of an occasion."

"Why, certainly, he will; but don't you be alarmed; he will runwith his own kind, and there's plenty of them. That is the maincharm of heaven--there's all kinds here--which wouldn't be the caseif you let the preachers tell it. Anybody can find the sort heprefers, here, and he just lets the others alone, and they let himalone. When the Deity builds a heaven, it is built right, and on aliberal plan."

There are limits to the privileges ofthe elect, even in heaven. Why, if Adam was to show himself toevery new comer that wants to call and gaze at him and strike himfor his autograph, he would never have time to do anything else butjust that. Talmage has said he is going to give Adam some of hisattentions, as well as A., I. and J. But he will have to changehis mind about that."

and wept on thirty-two hours in the twenty-four. They would betired out and as wet as muskrats all the time. What would heavenbe, to THEM? It would be a mighty good place to get out of--youknow that, yourself. Those are kind and gentle old Jews, but theyain't any fonder of kissing the emotional highlights of Brooklynthan you be. You mark my words, Mr. T.'s endearments are going to

promising themselves the same thing. As many as sixty thousandpeople arrive here every single day, that want to run straight toAbraham, Isaac and Jacob, and hug them and weep on them. Now mindyou, sixty thousand a day is a pretty heavy contract for those oldpeople. If they were a mind to allow it, they wouldn't ever haveanything to do, year in and year out, but stand up and be hugged

"Oh, there are a lot of such things that people expect and don'tget. For instance, there's a Brooklyn preacher by the name ofTalmage, who is laying up a considerable disappointment forhimself. He says, every now and then in his sermons, that thefirst thing he does when he gets to heaven, will be to fling hisarms around Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, and kiss them and weep onthem. There's millions of people down there on earth that are

"Well," says I, "I reckon I ought to be ashamed of myself, but thefact is I left them laying around that day I resigned from thechoir. I haven't got a rag to wear but this robe and the wings.""That's all right. You'll find they've been raked up and saved foryou. Send for them."

torches and have a high time over a barkeeper. It tickles thebarkeeper till he can't rest, it makes a charming lark for theyoung folks, it don't do anybody any harm, it don't cost a rap, andit keeps up the place's reputation for making all comers happy andcontent."